In our discussion today of "Bodies Out of Bounds", the point was made that what is acceptable as normal is often what is average, which by no means reflects the range of diversity along the spectrum. Among all the people out there, a handful of them are singled out and extremely visible to rest of us through the media. They reflect some ideal, not necessarily even representative of the average but one that plays a big part in defining the norm because other people use them as role models.
With respect to weight in particular, fashion models are viewed as ideal in the sense that clothes look the best on them and are essentially designed for them. Yet, models and people just as thin are mocked for their bodies, much like overweight individuals are. They are frequently described as being gross and unhealthy. Just last night, they made fun of Lara Flynn Boyle on Family Guy (she had to sleep under Peter's stomach to use his fat for warmth). Every sort of body type is under scrutiny, to some degree. In advertising there is the promise of the perfect body, but in the media and in our lives we are all too fat or too thin or too something else. Otherwise, what would we buy? Beauty is a business. Medicine and health are a business in many ways,too. I know I'm interested in anything that claims to help me live a long, healthy life and/or become more attractive, and I hate to admit that the latter tends to be a more pressing priority.
But while I'm on the subject of role models, I want to mention the Dalai Lama. If you didn't get the chance to see him speak, I can best describe his demeanor as joyous. Talk about inner beauty and the greatest smile I've ever seen! His Holiness explained viewing everyone, including himself, simply as a human being. Regardless of race, gender, religion, status, whatever - we are all brothers and sisters with a lot to learn and a lot to laugh about. There's nothing like humility and a sense of humor.
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3 comments:
You raise an interesting point in noting that to some degree every individual is placed under severe scrutiny. The ideal weight is variable both in time and place. More importantly, I feel that the ideal weight varies from individual to individual. It is for this reason that the superthin fashion models are ridiculed, even though to the beauty industry they are the perfect size. In order to combat this insatiable standard, it is crucial that one does not buy into "the ideal" of another. Be who you are solely because it is your personal decision to be that way.
I'm glad you brought up the Dalai Lama too. I really enjoyed his talk for similar reasons. His emphasis on his belief that we are all the same and that he is no different than anyone of us is truly inspiring and uplifting.
Your blog on role models made me wish that there was more diversity of role models especially for children. Our discussion about “Bodies out of Bounds” reminded me of how self-conscious I was of my own weight growing up. During elementary school I wasn’t obese, but I definitely had some baby fat and that was when I first felt the pressure to be thin. My opinion of what was the ideal body image came from seeing the success of slender girls who were in gymnastics or played other sports in the mandatory physical fitness tests we took each year at school. My classmates who participated in sports were able to do very well while those of us who didn’t play sports and didn’t have athletic bodies did poorly. What was even more frustrating was that the coach never prepared us for the tests. So not only did I feel bad that I couldn’t meet the expectations of these tests, but I also saw my weight as the problem. During middle school I didn’t like to go clothes shopping because I felt that I was too fat and the clothes wouldn’t look good on me when in reality that was not the case at all. In high school I slowly changed the way I viewed my body and used exercise help me change my body image.
I’m now very happy with the way my body looks and with my health. However, I think part of the reason I exercise now is because I’m afraid of becoming fat. Some of my fear comes from all the health problems that are associated with obesity. Another fear, though, is the stigma society has of obesity. It is seen as something you can control and is therefore your responsibility, so if you are fat then your body indicates you are indulgent and have no self control. I wish someone would have explained to me when I was younger how all bodies vary in size and shape and that I didn’t have to squeeze myself into a particular one as long as I was happy with myself.
The point you make about how even super models are made fun of for their weight is really interesting. So often people are so quick to jump to conclusions about how people feel about their own appearance, and it's completely unfair. For example, I have a friend who fits into the "ideal body type" mold as envisoned in the fashion world- she's tall, really thin, but still has curves. She has muscular calves and is EXTREMELY insecure about them. Whenever she complains, my friends write her off and ignore her insecurity, which I think is completely unfair. Why is it that just because they think her insecurity is "stupid", it's seen as less valid than people who might be insecure about being overweight (I'm using this as a single example of many that I think are more "socially acceptable" insecurities.)
I think, ultimately, we have to appreciate people for what they are, and allow them to feel whatever they choose to feel about their own personal appearance- and try not to judge them! It's already hard enough to deal with how we each see ourselves-- we don't need the added pressure of how others see us.
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